Sahara
by asalina
Summary: This is the story of a cat whose life takes a number of unfriendly turns. From birth to her final battle, this story shows how a kittypet's life takes her into a life of painful hardships as a rouge.
1. Chapter 1

A path many have already walked.

Blood that plague's ever step I have taken.

Anger.

Pain.

Betrayal.

My vision wouldn't clear. Everything around me was becoming black. My head was painfully dizzy. Each step foreword that I took could only be leading me to a death I did not seek. A sharp gasp rose from my throat, my sides heaving with to much effort.

"I'm done"

A hiss caressed my throat as the words of failure bit through my mind. It was over. Done. Gone. Not another paw step. I lowered my body to meet the dirty ground. My claws pierced into the soil beneath me as I inhaled with great effort.

I could feel myself being lifted. Flying? Was I flying in the air? My vision was to black. I couldn't see anything. I tried to open my eyes but gravity had forgotten to lift those as well. My breathing was ragged, painful gasps still fuming through me. Still, I could feel my body floating. Why was I floating? Why was I receiving a feeling of freedom? I didn't deserve it.

I was evil.

A monster. A life stealer. Murderer is you will. And every time I imagined the end I would think I would fall. Fall and choke on the blood I have spilled. I thought-- no I knew the end would be gruesome. That I would have pain inflicted on me like nothing I have ever felt before. That the revenge those cats I had killed deserved would be inflicted on me.

I had no reasons for murder. No forgiveness was necessary. Cruelty? Anger? Good versus evil? All of it seemed so foolishly petty now. What I knew was I had lived my life with far to many regrets. I had gone about doing things as I was told and I had hardly ever seen things the correct way. My brain and life had been corrupted. Now it was time to pay.

I let out a whimper of pain, wincing as something dripped onto my fur. My paws were dragging against the dirt and I realized that I really was dying. I had slightly hoped that since I had been floating, maybe I was just asleep. But feeling the rough ground tear into my weak paws I knew that I really was over and done. My soul could not fly free. I would forever be trapped. Dragging against thie dirt for eternity. Pain throbbing so deeply into my wounds I wanted to yowl in agony. But no one was there to listen.

"Sahara. Wake up"

My ears twitched painfully at the noise ringing in my ear.

"Sahara. Come on. Don't die on me. Please!" What a pitiful cry that was! I tried to roll over but the pain throbbing against my back was to much.

"Sahara you aren't going to die on me!"

Oh but I already _had died! I was trapped inside this dead decaying body! It's to late. Far far to late for me._

"_Sahara your piece of crowfood!"_

_Annoyance dug into my stomach. Why wouldn't he just shut up? I was dead. Wasn't that obvious? I was gone and I wouldn't return._

"_Sahara!"_

"_You piece of ugly foxdung shut up"_

_A gasp rose in his throat as my eye lids twitched open. "You really aren't dead" He whispered._

"_Yes I am" I snapped in a whisper. "But you make it very hard to rest in death so shut it" I closed my eyes again._

_And then I realized it._

_I really was alive!_

_My eyes opened once more to look at the tom's face that was stuck only a few mouse noses away from me. "Oh Sahara" He whispered, obviously wanting to press his nose into my fur. I really hoped he wouldn't. If he did I would have to claw him up and I was far to weak for that type of effort._

_He settled on licking my bloody nose._

"_What happened to you?"_

_I grunted a little, trying not to show the pain throbbing in my head as I lifted it. "Is that something you really care to know?" I questioned darkly._

"_Yes" He stared at me, blue eyes narrowing._

"_Ok" I meowed lowering my head back to the ground, angled so I could see him. My eyes drifted passed his head and at the stars._

"_I decided to mess with death. It won"_

"_No it didn't" He promised looking at me weakly. "You're still alive"_

_A bitter laugh crawled through my dry throat. "I would rather be dead then to bare the shame of loosing to that filthy cat"_

_His blue eyes gazed at me gently. "No worries my love" He whispered lowering his head to touch the ground. "That filthy cat will die. I know you can kill him."_

_I let out a wicked laugh snarling "Abyss you know so very little! He was your father. He was my mentor. But it seems I know far more about Hiddenwing then you ever have." _

_Abyss looked at me, eyes gentle. "I could care less about that." His voice was far to kind for me to bare. "I want to know about you, Sahara. I want to know everything that's happened to you."_

_I snickered a little closing my weak eyes. "And why, you fool, should I tell?"_

"_Didn't I just save your life?" He questioned, head tilted._

_My green eyes narrowed a bit as I looked at him. "And I should open up every part of my soul because of that?"_

_The tom nodded his head, giving my sore neck a gentle lick. "Tell me your story" He meowed softly into my ear. "Let me understand you. I already told you. No matter what you say or do, I will forever love you. I want to know what you have always hid from the group."_

_My paws ached to claw away his face, but I knew they were to weak to even move. "Abyss." I meowed softly. "Your love is unwanted."_

"_But it will always remain. So tell me now. You owe me your life, don't you?"_

_Anger pulsed through me, but I couldn't find a way around telling him what he wanted to know. He would only keep bothering me. And I could never get sleep around this cat anyways. He always felt the need to press himself against me. Lick me or mumble his love for me. What a foolish cat. Love was stupid. It meant nothing. Eventually he would have to realize he was only an annoyance to me, and I hoped he would be hurt enough to leave me alone._

"_Sahara" He meowed._

"_Okay" I grumbled at last. "Well, did you know I was born a kitty pet?"_

_He stared, eyes partly wide. "N-no" He mumbled._

_I let out a soft sigh, ribs aching. "I guess I have to start from the beginning then."_


	2. Chapter 2

The morning was cool, the rain drops dripping from only the leaves now. The gray clouds had passed sometime in the night, leaving blue skies above. Inside the nest, 5 kits mewed and whined.

"Shh!" Their mother hissed, little patience with the litter. "Hush!" Her white tail thrashed in annoyance, ears pinning back with irritation. "Phinx! Lola! _Sahara!_" The middle aged kitty pet didn't bother to say the name's of all five kits, finding it useless as they moved themselves around the hard floor. Her tail curled over her body, resting lightly on her paws as she glared at the wandering kits. "Would you all come here NOW!" The hiss in her throat was suddenly much louder then her previous warnings and all but one kit turned their attention onto their mother.

"Sahara."

A small black kit looked up at her name, turning toward the white and brown she-cat who eyed her with an angry glare. "Pay attention. Stop exploring and come _here._"

Frowning, the small she-kit pawed herself out from the dusty corner and toward her mother and siblings. Her black ears pinned back as she gazed up at the large she-cat, a bit of worry in her.

"You won't be staying here much longer." The she-cat stated simply. "You will be taken to different homes, each very far from here. You're new twolegs won't allow you to see one another or myself." she gazed down at her only son, a black tom, the twin of Sahara. Her pink tongue stroked his forehead gently meowing "I will miss you."

The other kits took this in as a goodbye to each of them, but to any older cat it was obvious the only one she was to miss was Phinx.

"Phoenix" Phinx meowed after a long yawn, "Why must we be taken away? I like it here!"

Phoenix gazed down at her son with gentle eyes. "Twolegs cannot care for so many cats. There are many cats in this world, but more twolegs. Trust me, it's best this way." Phinx pouted, and lowered his gaze to the ground, obviously hurt by his mother's words.

"But Phoenix." Sahara meowed slowly. "Why don't we all take care of ourselves? I heard Tabby talking about last sunhigh. He said cats lived out in the woods, a whole group of them! Bigger then our family, and probably Sarah's too!"

Her mother's hiss made her flinch back words, bumping into her sister. "The four clan's are wild. Ruthless. They would rip off your face if you tried to join them. A fate I wouldn't mind seeing you in." Her mother's emerald eyes glared down, dislike fuming from everyone of her hairs.

Sahara stared up, speechless. "I… I didn't know." She managed to mumble.

"Of course you didn't know!" Phoenix spat with fury. "Because you never _listen!_" Phoenix parted her jaws, obviously about to say more when she suddenly swerved around to see a twoleg approaching. The twoleg said something, before opening the large entrance that was normally blocked by wood. The kits let out meows of delight as they charged out of the twoleg nest, Phoenix trailing behind slowly, the bell around her collar ringing.

Sahara bounded toward the fence, and attempted to jump up, only to ram head first into it and fall backwards. She let out a meow of pain before drooping her head. She glanced around to check w hat her siblings were doing. Most of them were hanging around the bushes, sniffing around and play fighting. Phinx stood only a rabbit hop away from Sahara, dark green eyes narrowed.

"What are you planning to do?" He meowed, trying not to hiss.

"I'm going to go into the forest. Are you coming?" Sahara replied simply, ears twitching with excitement.

"Of course not!" Sahara flinched away as her mother jumped in between Phinx and Sahara, eyes narrowed in anger. "Phinx would never go into such disgusting area's, especially not with a disgrace like you!" Phoenix glared down at Sahara, making every fur on her body prick up with fear.

"But… Mother-"

"Sahara, _leave._" Phoenix spat, anger swelling through her. "I never want to see you again! You are disgusting. I am sick of trying to teach you how to behave! You want to be eaten out there? Then go ahead! Listen to Tabby's stories about how sweet the clan cats are. I will not be taking you back when you come crying about them hurting you!"

Sahara's deep green eyes widened, pain slipping through them. She stared at her mother's hard face, body trembling. She was sick of this! Why was her mother always so… So _cruel?! Sahara had done nothing to deserve this! Her small black paws took a step backwards, before she turned around completely and darted beneath the fence post, dashing toward the dark depths of the forest. She ignored the hiss coming from behind her. She was done with that! There had to be a better life in the forest!_

_--_

_I gazed at Abyss, but his blue eyes were drifting toward the dark night sky. For a moment, he didn't realize I had stopped speaking, and he turned his attention onto me. "Keep going." He meowed, more an order then a request._

"_This is where Hiddenwing comes in." I meowed quietly. A frown came onto his expression but he only nodded and meowed "Good. I've been curious about how you met him."_

_A sigh pressed its way out of my nose and I meowed "I'm thirsty. Get me some water."_

_Obediently Abyss rose and started off into the shadows. I didn't doubt he would find moss and water. Even if it was muddy liquids, he would come back with something to quench my thirst. I lowered my head onto my paws as I waited, the bugs making it impossible to shut my eyes. I wished Abyss was less curious about my life, and more wiling to keep it going. I needed something to ease the pain, and help the wounds not get infected. Ah, were was a medicine cat when you needed one?_

_His tan body appeared in front of me, a clump of moss dangling from his jaws. He dropped it in front of me, and I slowly started to lick away the water drops. "So, keep going." He ordered when I stopped licking. My dark green eyes gazed into his blue ones, an urge running down my spine to claw them out. He had no right to give me orders! Who did he think he was?_

_Pressing my eyes tightly shut I meowed quietly "I was starving before two sunrises had passed."_


End file.
